The Ten of Swords in a Tarot Reading does look gruesome…

It is the ultimate LET GO card in the tarot deck.

The Ten of Swords does look gruesome however If you look passed the swords, there is the promise of a new dawn……

Let go of control.  Of your ego  e.g. your ego trying to control life, yourself or others. Let go of trying to work everything out with the logical mind, of all those beliefs and ideas that you think make up your identity.  And you think are ‘right’. Let go of all of it.

Your ‘will’ is not going to win….with 10 swords stuck in your back you are going to bleed to death unless you surrender ‘your way’……to a new dawn.   The rather beautiful dawn painted behind the prone figure is where hope lies.

I pulled it as my daily reflection card having woken up feeling decidedly blurry/tired, again! This time from the effects of two delicious vodka martinis followed by red wine at dinner. I was thinking ‘how do I deal with this? Clearly I have lost the ability to drink and it doesn’t take much to give me a headache. However, I wasn’t modifying my behaviour….my ‘bad influence friend.’  I use that term for the me who does like to party, in honour to a client yesterday who got the Devil in a relationship spread and said ‘oh perhaps I am a bad influence in this relationship with my drinking’…..or something along those lines.

I don’t have a husband.  Or a boyfriend.  Or a partner, I do have a relationship with a Sue who loves to drink. And she seems to hold sway over the sober Sue.

This habit, and It is a habit.  My go to end of the day reward. The gin and tonic as a pick up. A glass or two of wine with supper. Ot three, that I try to control.  Because who enjoys a headache.  

Before I pulled a card my thoughts were going along the lines of am I just going to have accept the swings and roundabouts of this relationship with ‘lets switch off with a drink or two Sue,’ rather than the responsible, diligent ‘to do list’ focussed and sincere tarot card reading Sue’.

And I picked the 10 of swords. My first reaction was that the ‘let go’ 10 0f swords tarot card says stop the struggle for control, you are not going to win that way.  Let go the need to control, judge, resist, be upset by ..they do say what you resist persists? Is this the meaning the 10 of swords has for me? 

Or ? and it took me a while (after a bath) to also consider

LET go . Of drinking totally, for a new dawn.

The 10 0f swords card could easily represent letting go to a higher power, as in the AA serenity prayer…

 God grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change,

Courage to change the things I can, and

Wisdom to know the difference.

Perhaps that’s the meaning for me. And I certainly fancy serenity.

 hmmm

A conundrum indeed.

Which I shall ponder …and may be pull another card for more insight tomorrow.

After 24 hours of pondering.  And a discussion over lunch with my accountant and a glass of wine, he said ‘don’t fall out with your fun friend’!.  Mind you he doesn’t suffer the hangovers!  I pulled a second card.

And pulled the World.   The card of completion, wholeness, being enough.  She is in the centre of her world, not beholden to anything, the wreath of success surrounds her.  A moment of perfection.

The final card in the Major Arcana when we have a moment of completion when we are in the centre of our world, not overly dependent on anything for feeling whole and complete.

Again, first thought, you are enough Sue, you are Ok, encompass all aspects of yourself.  You are perfect as you are.   Which can’t be true of course.  But perhaps the World was saying appreciate that you are a fully formed whole person with strengths and weaknesses like any whole person, who knows they are worth belonging to the world. Or something.

Second thought.  Ten of Swords.  Let go of having a drink it’s not something you can control, if you try you will bleed to death and miss the new dawn.  The World…..  Then I am whole, enough, perfect. And in the centre of my world, not dependant on anything.

Oh dear.  Plenty to ponder, which is why I love the tarot.  I don’t use it in a tell me my future way, when I read Tarot I always say I don’t do predictions. The Tarot however does speak of the potential at hand for us to harness (for want of a better word for now) said potential by giving insight and direction about the best way to navigate what is going on.  It has given me such good advice and insight over the years.  I am going to have to allow these ideas to percolate through my system as clearly I’m not able to DECIDE …right now.

I wonder where I will land.

i will say that the Tarot giving me the World as the second card, seems very generous and encouraging. Out of 78 cards, it could have given me a card of clear warning, but no she gave me the World and I do feel incredibly lucky about my life at the moment, and feel I am in the right place at the right time and so grateful to love Tarot and have a profession and I find utterly fascinating.  Perhaps the World is more a card about appreciating this feeling of completeness, being enough, and breathing that in.  And with that thought, take a deep breathe…..and relax.  That always helps! Especially since after we reach the final card of the Major Arcana, the World.  We start all over with the first card of the major arcana, The Fool, a brand new journey…

Do come and have a tarot reading with me in Battersea or online via zoom or whatsapp video.